Before I begin I just want to say that I know worse things have happened to people at school but this is the worst thing I experienced at school. It happened quite recently actually, a few weeks ago. I was behind on my project in art and was avoiding the teacher( let’s call her Ms.O) as best as i could. She had given out to me about how slow I am before and had insulted my parents before( who are amazing people, who, by the way, she hasn’t met) but that’s a story for another time.
My hand is shaking as I write this. Ms.O took me to the front of the class and started shouting at me, saying I wouldn’t get anywhere in life, that my parents are irresponsible for telling me not be bother with this subject (which, for the record, they hadn’t done and I never hinted to her that they had) and after I answered “no” to her asking me if I’m going to college she got – i guess upset, with me and started shouting some more. What I did next might seem soft and childish of me but I can’t handle people shouting at me. At all. I started crying, in front of my whole class. I wasn’t full-on sobbing but tears were running down my face. I’d like to think they were elegant tears like you see on TV but knowing me, I got red and puffy.
Ms.O didn’t like me making her seem harsh so she grabbed my arm and said “Let’s talk at the back”. I was having none of it so ,as gently as I could, I pulled my arm out of her grasp and ,as she probably didn’t want to make a bigger show of herself, she let go of me. A girl I barely know came up to me and handed me a tissue. I was so thankful for something I could hide my embarrassingly red face behind. Ms.O called me to the back room of the art class. I hid my face the whole way down and could hear some of my classmates saying quietly “you don’t have to go if you don’t want to” but I knew this mess would just get bigger and more annoying if I didn’t go.
When I walked into the back room she made me sit with my back to the class “so they’re not staring at you”. Wow, thanks you’re so thoughtful. She then went on to what I suppose was an apology. Starting off with “I’m sorry, I’m just used to tough students, you know? I could mop the floor with them and they wouldn’t bat an eye” Cheers miss I feel so much better now. Then she went on to the put yourself in my shoes nonsense. Then, the grand finale “So are we okay now?”. I didn’t know what to say, so I just said what I’ve been saying the whole time she’s been talking – “Yes miss”.
My friends were convincing me to report her for days. I felt that if I reported her I’d be a liar because I told her it was okay. Every class I’ve had with her since she’s been tip toeing around me and I realised – she’s scared I’ll report her. A few days after the incident I was helping a teacher with something on his computer and while he was out of the room a group of older girls walked in and one of them was crying, she was the sort of girl you don’t want to get on the bad side of. I caught bits of their conversation and realised they were talking about Ms.O. What they were saying convinced me I’m not alone and if I speak up, I won’t be the only one that benefits.
I finally worked up the courage to report her. I only got to do it the 3rd time I tried, which made me unsure whether I wanted to do it or not. When I finally got to do it, I started telling the story and I cried. The teacher I was talking to said “and what happened upset you?” No, I’m crying because I loved being in that situation so much. I just nodded. “I can’t do anything about it because I’m only a teacher too. you’d have to go to the vice principal if you want something to be done about it, but honestly? That would take so much time you’re better off just letting it slide. Focus on your exams” That’s the last I’ve ever spoken about it because the school system made me feel so dejected.